Stylized line drawing of mark playing the flute

I am the dude with the hat

There is a hat from the San Francisco Hat Company that I spent almost a year lusting after.

It is the Riverz Utah. A super wide-brim hat (5 inches!) with a lifeguard-style crown. It’s made of synthetic straw so it’s crushable and waterproof.

Last Christmas, my dreams came true. My wife gave it me as an early present, just in time for our vacation. Now I wear it everywhere. I wear it on walks. I wore it in the winter. Now that it’s hot, I wear it in the pool.

We were at the pool today treading water when a group of teenage boys went swimming by. One of them stopped short right next to me and pointed.

β€œYou’re the dude with the hat!”

β€œYeah, that’s me.”

β€œI see you all over the place. That hat is…like…majestic.”

And he swam off.

Goddamn right, it’s majestic.